This is Killing Me!

08Mar11

I’m trying so hard right now to lose weight, but I just feel like nothing is enough. I have no clue what I’m doing and everything is just stressing me out. So many different people tell me so many different things, how am I supposed to know what’s actually right? What is the right motivation? How long is too long to work out? How little is too little to eat? Do I focus on how much I hate myself now or how much I’ll love myself in the future?

I feel like even though I say I’m trying really hard, I’m just barely getting by. I need to force food I hate down my throat. I need to find something to keep my mind off of food and how much it sucks to not be lazy. People keep saying that there are all these fat people in the world, like it’s a fucking epidemic. Well, tell me, where the hell are these people? I look around and I don’t see one person who is in my shoes. Everyone’s tiny and perfect and I’m just a misfit. Normally, being abnormal is what I strive for. But not in this sense. I’m tired of being depressed and anxious. I want to be capable of happiness.

I have so many dreams about my life, but none of them include being overweight. Besides, being a fatass is the only reason I don’t follow those dreams. I’m insecure and I hate everything about myself and my life. How am I supposed to do anything when I feel this way? I want to go on The Biggest Loser or something so at least I’d have someone yelling at me and pushing me and making me do things I never thought were possible.

I need to research now, because apparently it’s the only thing I’m able to do.

I complain too much, I guess. Ugh.

Bye,

— Sarah Tyler Deen

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2 Responses to “This is Killing Me!”

  1. 1 Pippi

    Haha, I always forget that I’m blogging in swedish. Tanks for the grade! 🙂

  2. I can tell you abit of what I’ve learned over the years. I’ve never really had weight problems. Pretty much the opposite, I have a hard time gaining weight when I want more muscles. But anyhow, I train everday and I do mix martial arts on a proffesional level so I got some good knowledge about training, food in general.

    The best thing to do to loose weight:
    -Think longterm, barely not eating works for maybe 2weeks. But then your body thinks your in a rough time, so its starts saving up all the food you eat, instead of incinerate fat or digest. You should eat 4 times a day, but eat healthy and never eat yourself full, the more often you eat the more you incinerate, just make sure you dont eat to much all 4 meals.
    -Train HARD and atleast 5imes a week, keep pushing yourself, 2hour workout is perfect. Set yourself goals for each month, run further, lift heavier weights, do more reps, you know all that jazz. Just make sure you’ve given it all after each workout. There’s so many that go to gyms and dont work out hard at all, then you might aswell sit home on your sofa.
    -Get atleast 8hours of sleep and allways eat breakfast, try to drink mostly water.

    -Results dont come the next day, just keep with a strict routine like the one I described above. And I can guarantee, in 3months you see tremendous results. Then you keep doing it and you get more experienced in what to eat, train yourself and you can keep loosing weight and achieving great results for the next year.

    Best regards, Fredrik.


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